


I'm in love with a killer. (Kellic)

by Allamazingfandomsarenotonfire



Category: Pierce the Veil, Sleeping With Sirens
Genre: Alcohol, Bullying, Dark Past, Depression, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Flashbacks, Fluff, Hearing Voices, Kidnapping, M/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Murder, Non-Graphic Smut, Past Child Abuse, Past Drug Use, Physical Abuse, Self-Hatred, Starvation, Stockholm Syndrome, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2016-12-01
Packaged: 2018-09-03 09:37:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8707243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Allamazingfandomsarenotonfire/pseuds/Allamazingfandomsarenotonfire
Summary: Vic has problems. He can't take control over his own life, so he takes control of others. He chooses if, when, and how his victims die, and it makes him feel invincible; in control. He has no problem taking lives.. Until he runs into a boy named Kellin.





	1. I was finally in control.

**Vics POV**

_I've never been in control_.

When I was young, my father controlled everything. Not just me, but my mom, too. He'd use physical force if he had to- which seemed to be everyday- until my mom left. 

That's when it all started.

That's when my dad started drinking and shooting heroin. That's when my teachers started questioning the bruises on my neck and arms. The ones they could see. If only they saw what I hid underneath.

But never cared enough to do anything about it.

When he was high, he would usually be in his room leaving me alone. I was only nine at this time- and fending for myself. He'd be in his room with some whore he picked up off the side of the road.  _I couldn't ever sleep._

_"Make it stop._

_Make it stop!_

_MAKE IT STOP!"_

I'd scream into my pillow every night. _I was exhausted_. I hadn't slept in days. The noises would stop around six in the morning, usually the time I had to get up. I'd be sent off to school with a slap in the back off the head and a remark like  _"You're useless"_  or  _"I'm so sick of having a faggot as a son. Don't come home."_ But I always did. I had no where else to go.

I had no control at school, either. This boy named Bret always acted like my father.

And I hated it. _I hated him._

Every day was the same thing;

He'd beat me in the hall before school.

He'd dump my lunch on me in the cafeteria.

He'd tear my work up before I could turn it in.

He'd call me names and trip me in the halls.

He'd beat me up before I got on the bus.

_Every. Single. Day._

I'd come home to my dad high as a kite at the table.

 _"I got a call from your school earlier. You're failing class."_ He'd slur and get up angrily.

"I'm sorry. I did do my work.."

Then he'd slap me to the floor.

 _"Then why are you failing??"_  

"There's a k-kid in class named Bret who always tears my work up and-"

He'd kick me.

_"You weak faggot! I can't believe you let people walk all over you! You're useless!"_

He'd kick me again.

_"I hate you!"_

"I'm sorry!" 

 _"DONT RAISE YOUR VOICE TO ME!"_  He'd scream before I was given a beat down.

I'd cower in my room all night after that and would get no dinner.

_Every. Single. Day._

_For seven years._

One day I had had enough.

I was in the kitchen about to eat for the first time in almost a week. I was so hungry. Then my dad came in while I was finishing, I was cutting it in half like my mom always used to. He grabbed my sandwich and began to eat it.

"D-dad that was mine.."

That was a mistake.

_"Everything in this house is **MINE**!" _

He'd scream at me.

_"That includes **you** , you useless trash!"_

He kicked my legs out from under me.

And that's when I had enough.

I took the knife I was making my sanwhich with  
and _I stabbed him._

_Eighty seven times._

I couldn't stop myself.

I just saw red. I took everything out on his body and I just couldn't stop. It was my choice whether he lived or died that day. 

That's where I found my first victim.

**_I was finally in control._ **


	2. I never looked back.

I was only 16 that day.

The day I killed my _worst enemy and took control of my life._

I packed food, water, clothes, my Dads drug money stash, and his gun.

I walked into the school and walked right up to Bret.

 _"You're late, faggot. I'm feeling like leaving a mark today."_ He said as he cracked his knuckles.

_"Are you ready for the worst day of your life?"_

"No." I said sternly.

"Are you?"

I reached into my pocket.

_"wh-"_

I pulled out the gun. 

I _savored_  the terror in his eyes.

I pointed the gun _directly_ in his face.

And I _pulled the trigger._

*****  
I turned around and I walked out the doors. 

I heard sirens in the distance and I walked to the nearest bench. 

_I got on a bus._

_I left that town._

_And I never looked back._

And that brings us to today.

I'm 25 and living alone.

Well, other than my guests, that is.

I live in a house in on a dirt road by the woods so people can't hear their screams.

I keep track of each individual person I bring here with a  _small bunch of their hair._

Before I take control, I give them a great time because I know what it's like to have all control stripped from you, leaving you vulnerable and afraid.

But I have to do this.

I can't control the urges.

I go to a nearby bar or club and I pick a target, usually the person who's by themselves. I buy them a few drinks, we dance, then we go to my place. Instead of taking advantage right away, we have more drinks because _alcohol numbs pain._ Then I let them choose what we do, then we eat and have a super fun night.

_Then they fall sleep._

They wake up in my basement tied to a chair.

I let them choose one person to say goodbye to, how they want to say it, and I text it to them on a cheap, disposable cellphone and sign it with their name and immediately crush it into dust.

I explain why I'm doing what I'm doing hoping to calm them down.

_It never works._

At first, I always feel sympathetic. But then, it's like something takes over me..

Because then I love hearing them beg for their lives. 

They always see the change in my eyes.

They always look into my eyes and beg, then go silent and fear overtakes theirs.

I take a tiny section of their hair, wrap it in a rubberband, cut it off, then put it in a drawer in my room. 

Then I go back downstairs and I intie them.  
Because when they have a chance at freedom and you take it away, it's  _so much more satisfying._

They run for the door, I after chase them, and once they realize its locked, they turn around.

This is usually when they fight.

I've had to hit a few people, but I hated it because I felt just like my father.

_Killing them is different._

It's _exactly what my father didn't have the balls to do to me._

Then, _I stab them._

 _Eighty seven times_ , just like my father.

Then I bury them somewhere in the woods. No one has ever found them.

_And no one ever will._

*******

I went to a bar again today. 

I haven't had a victim in a few days, and I'm feeling the urges. I'm hearing the voices. 

This is the only way to shut them up.

_"You can't ever do anything right"_

_"You're useless trash"_

_"No wonder your mother left"_

"Shut up! Shut up you're wrong!" I'd scream and hit myself in the head.

_"Coward"_

_"Hated"_

_"Fag"_

"Shut up! Shut up!" I'd hit myself harder.

I need a drink.

*****

"Come here often?" A man approached me at the bar.

This is the first time I wasn't the first to talk.

"Yeah" I chuckled and took a drink of my beer. "Way too often I'd say."

He quietly giggled.

I looked him up and down. He was classy, he was wearing a suit with a peacock feather in the patch pocket.

His black silky hair was long like mine, and underneath his bangs were beautiful green eyes that had a hint of blue when the light reflected off of them just right. He has beautiful pale skin that contrasts his hair wonderfully. His smile was shy and perfect, and his giggle was the best thing of all. 

I smiled.

"Vic Fuentes." I held out my hand.

He took my hand in a firm handshake and smiled back.

"I'm Kellin. Kellin Quinn."

 


	3. I couldn't get myself to do it..

**Vics POV**

_Everything started out normal._

I bought him a drink, we talked, we danced..

_But something was different about this boy._

He offered _me_ a drink.

He was interested in what _I_ had to say.

 _He_ was flirting with _me_.

His eyes weren't wandering either, no, they were in contact with mine the _whole_ night.

Before we got too drunk, and we went out to my car. Before I started it, we stared talking.

It started with interests. It turns out we're interested in a lot of the same stuff-we love music, we love to sing, we love late night movies, and we love turtles.

 _But then, he opened up about his past_.

"Yeah, my father was a piece of shit."

"What do you mean?" I asked. Usually it's because they weren't there or they were strict. So I wanted to see what he had to say.

But it turns out, we share that same quality, too.

"He hit me a lot. My mom died during childbirth and he blamed me." He said with a chuckle.

_It was like a sick joke to him._

"My teachers would question it, but never actually do anything. I was bullied for my high voice and big eyes. Then I'd go home for another beating because of something he didn't like about me."

"Oh." I'd all I could say.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. My father was the same. And for the record, I think your voice is adorable and your eyes are beautiful" I turned to him and smiled.

He looked down shyly.

I tilted his chin up to look me in the eyes.

_"I mean it."_

And that's when it happened.

He lunged forward and _kissed me._

I hesitated at first.. But just as I tired to return it, he pulled away.

"I-Im sorry.. I- Um.. I should go" he turned red and turned to open the car door. When he realized it was locked, he turned to look at me.

I shoved a damp cloth in his face and held it there until he stopped moving.

I started the car and drove home.  
*****

Finally, he started to wake up.

"Hey there, sleepy head!" I said as I was finishing cleaning my knife.

"W-where am I? What was on that rag earlier?" He asked in a panic as he fought his restraints.

I chuckled. "Oh, just some chloroform."

" _Why_?" He started to shake. "Is it because I kissed you? I'm sorry I shouldn't ha-"

"No, silly" I smiled and walked over to him.

I held the knife to his cheek so he'd look at me.

"It's just because I want to."

He didn't say anything. He just sat with wide eyes. _Wide, beautiful, terrified eyes._

"You see, I never had control as a boy. My father hit me, my teachers- oh, you know the story all to well" I giggled.  
"Long story short, this way I have control."

I cut his hair. "W-what was that for?"

"I take hair from all of my victims. That's how I keep track."

He looked at me with worry. "How many people have you killed?" He asked in a plain, flat voice.

"Last time I counted, 1,095. One person every three days since I was sixteen." I smiled.

"Why so many?" He cried.

This is how I quiet down the voices in my head for a few days." I held the knife to his cheek again.

"This is how I'm able to sleep at night."  
***

"You ready?"

"F-for what?"

"I'm untying you" I smiled and untied him.

He sat there confused.

"Well? Aren't you gonna run?"

Without second thought, he sprinted to the door.  
Like always, he realized it was locked and chose to fight.  
As I pushed him back against the wall, my elbow slipped and knocked him right in the eye.

_Hard._

He fell to the floor, just like I did when I was a kid.

_I felt awful.. I didn't mean to do it..._

He cupped his face and sobbed, then looked at me with a swelling eye and tears in his eyes.

 _"You're just like my father."_ He said in a dead voice.

"I'm sorry-I didn't mean to-" I stepped back...

_Then I felt nothing._

I walked up to him and pulled him up to his feet, I shoved him back up against the wall. I went to plunge the knife into his chest like I had done over a thousand times before, but something stopped me. I tried so hard...  
_But I couldn't get myself to do it._

I screamed in frustration and stabbed the knife into the wall. I dragged him to the chair and tied him back up.

Then I left.


	4. I couldn't sleep.

What was that back there? I asked myself as I paced in my room.

_Why couldn't I do it?_

Why do I feel this way? I've never felt this feeling before... I don't know how to explain it. I just don't want to hurt him. Like, I do, I really do, I want to slit his throat and stab him two times more of the amount that I stab everyone else...

_But I can't do it._

I groaned and sat at my desk.

I pulled his strand of hair out of my pocket and went to put it in my drawer.

But it felt more important than the other strands.

So I put it beside my bed on my nightstand and laid down.

_I couldn't get to sleep._

After hours and hours of tossing and turning, I looked at my clock and it read "2:39 am".

Maybe I'll go pay little Kellin a visit.  
*****

I walked downstairs to see him with his head hung down. But he wasn't asleep...

_He was crying._

I couldn't help but feel the urge- not to kill- but to comfort. To hug.

"Hey, hey, don't cry" I said quietly as I knelt beside him and stroked the back of his head.

He flinched on contact... And it made me feel _horrible_.

He lifted his head to look at me, and my eyes went wide.

His eye was a dark purple, almost black, and it was swolled to the point where he couldn't open it at all. Tears stained his cheeks and fear and hatred glazed over his eyes.

"C'mere" I said quietly as I pulled him into a hug. He sobbed into my chest.

"What did I do wrong?" He whispered gently.

My heart dropped into my stomach.

I held him a bit longer.

Then I untied his hands.

"Let's go put some ice on that."  
*****

He sat on my kitchen counter silently, only to thank me when I gently put some ice on his eye and held it for him, then go silent again.

"I'm sorry for kissing you earlier. I-"

"No no, dont be. That kiss was amazing"

"I don't know. I still shouldn't have..." He sighed and we went silent again.

He jumped down onto the floor.

He stared into my eyes. I stared right back into his beautiful earth-like orbs. My eyes made their way down his gentle button nose.. to his soft rose lips.

"Look i-" he began.. But I couldn't hold back anymore.

I lunged forward and cupped his face in my hands and kissed him harshly. He immediately pulled me into it more by my shoulders and his eyelids fluttered shut. He shoved his tongue through my barely parted lips and our tongues danced in perfect harmony.. My hands slid behind his head and I gripped his hair- hard enough for it to hurt. He winced, but fell right back into the hole we were digging together. He pushed me through the kitchen door and down the hall without even breaking away. He opened and glanced into two rooms before he found the bedroom. He broke the kiss and pushed me back onto the bed. He straddled my hips for a moment, but then he flipped me on top and pulled me down into another harsh kiss. His hand slid up the back of my shirt and ran over the large sensitive scars across my back...

~ _Flashback_.~

 _ **"Boy, dont you run from me!"**_ He screamed

"I'm sorry!" I sobbed as I held the bathroom door shut.

He overpowered me and ripped the door open and lunged at me.

He pushed me to the floor and I fell on my stomach.

He grabbed the nearest object and started whipping- or rather _slashing_ \- across my back with it.

_He had grabbed his single blade shaver and was **slashing my back open with it**._

He threw me by my hair into my room and slammed my door.

I curled up on my blankets and cried myself to sleep.

_~back to reality~_

I opened my eyes as tears poured out of them and I jumped out of the bed.

I stared at Kellin, who was understandingly confused and hurt, and I wiped my tears.

I grabbed him by his shirt and dragged him to the basement door.

"Vic? Vic what did I do? Vic!" He screamed as I opened the door and pushed him down the stairs. I heard thudding, then a loud bang.

_I slammed the door._

_I curled up in my bed._

_And I cried myself to sleep._


	5. I just didn't want to go..

**Kellins POV**

"Vic? What did I do? Vic!" I cried as he grabbed me and started to drag me out of the room.

_What did I do wrong?_

I tried to remove his grasp on the back of my shirt collar and stand up. But he had a death grip.

He dragged me to the basement door and swung it open.. _Oh god_.

He threw me down the stairs and slammed the door.

I laid there on the bottom step for a moment and groaned in pain. I tried to get up, but my arms gave out from under me. So I just laid there and silently sobbed until I fell asleep.  
*****

I woke up the next morning hurting worse than before. I tried to get up again, but i failed.

All I could do was lay there.

_For days._

After five miserable, cold days, i attempted to stand up again. And even though it took over ten minutes to get on my feet, I was able to do it this time. I looked around the room.

There was a chair in the middle of the room and a metal table in the back corner with a dirty mirror hanging above it.

I held my aching ribcage and limped over to the mirror. I wiped across it with my free hand.

I looked _horrible_... And it hasn't even been a week.

 

My eye was still swollen beyond recognition, black and purple from my eyebrow to my cheekbone.  
Tears stained my face and my hair was both sticking to it and a crazy mess.

I winced in pain as I stood up straight and gently lifted my shirt to reveal a black and blue mess. The left side of my rib cage was two times its original size and bruised worse than I've ever seen anything bruised before. It was burning and pulsing. When I tried to touch it, I jumped back and groaned, my eyes squeezed shut and more tears staining my face.

I didn't even want to look at my ankle.

I already knew what a twisted ankle looked like; bruised and the size of a softball.

I limped over to the chair and sobbed quietly into my hands.

_What did I do wrong?_

**Vics POV**

I paced in my room all night.

_What was that about?_

I've never kissed anyone before..  
When he kissed me I melted inside.

I couldn't stop myself when I threw him down those stairs. Its been days. Maybe he didn't survive so I don't have to feel this way anymore.  
****

I can't even tell you how many times I walked to the basement door and reached for the door knob.  
I stop myself, though. I can't have an emotional connection with this boy.

With anyone..  
I can't do that to myself.

I can't do that to him.

**Kellins POV**

I looked at the door after my eyes grew dry and I lost the ability to cry. I stared for hours. Something shiny to my right caught my eye..

The knife in the wall.

_I know what I have to do._

**Vics POV**

I finally decided to go down there.

Just as I reached for the knob, I heard a loud cry.

I stumbled down the stairs.

" ** _No!_** " I screamed and sprinted to him and caught him before he hit the ground.

There was a knife in his stomach.

"Kellin! Kellin keep your eyes open! Don't go to sleep, stay with me!"

_Why do I even care? He was supposed to die._

I rushed to the drawer and pulled out an unopened first aid kit.

_I can fix this._

**Kellins POV**

I woke up in an unfamiliar room.

_Maybe it was just a nightmare._

I tried to sit up but a burning pain shot through my abdomen.

I felt a hand gently press down on my chest.

"Careful, you might not want to do that"

I recognized the voice.

_It wasn't a dream._

I went to say something awful, but I stopped myself. No matter what he's done. How awful he's been to me..

_I couldn't be mad at him._

He hasn't fed me since I got here.

He hit me.

He screwed with my feelings

He threw me downstairs.

He battered and bruised me.

Yet, his smile still melted me on the inside.  
His laugh still made my heart skip a beat.  
His skin still reflected the sunlight so beautifully..

_I just couldn't hate him._

"I decided maybe you should go." He said without looking up from the floor.

"Wh-what?"

"I'm not going to kill you. Just go."

For some reason... _I didn't want to leave._

I normally would have looked past my horrible state and got up and left...

_But I just didn't want to go._


	6. That's all I'll ever need.

**Vics POV**

"I don't want to go." He simply stated.

"...What?"

"I don't know. I just don't." He shrugged.

_He can't stay here. I don't want to hurt him.._

_What if I lose control again?_

_I can't risk it._

_This is the only person I haven't wanted to slaughter._

_I don't understand..._

"Go!" I shouted. I don't know what this feeling is.... It's a confusing state where I don't want to hurt him at all but I also want to torture and kill him all at once.

"Why!?" He screamed

"You brought me here by _force_! I tried to leave and you _forced_ me here! Why do you all of a sudden want me to _leave_!?"

"Why do you all of a sudden want to _stay_?!?"

"I don't know!" He screamed

"Come on! Give me _one_ good reason why I should let you stay!'

"I said _I DONT KNOW_!"

"GIVE ME ONE REASON" I was screaming in his face at this point, he was sat up and screaming back into mine.

" **BECAUSE I THINK I LOVE YOU!** "

"Y-you what?" I all of a sudden sat back in my seat.

"I don't know, okay! I just don't want to go!.." He started sobbing. "I just don't want to leave you!"

_I cut him off with another kiss_

_I pulled him forward by his shirt and I tasted his soft lips once more._

He didn't hesitate to cup my face with his hands and kiss back..

He pulled me forward so I was on top.

I pulled away for a moment.

" **I think I love you, too** " I said gently.

_So this is love?_

Our tongues danced once more.

I put his body to the test with mine..

_All night long._

He gave his _everything_ , and I received _all_ I've ever wanted.

**_I received control._ **

_This, however was a different feeling of control._

His body fit _perfectly_ under mine...

_He completed me._

The hot, still air was only interrupted by the soft noises that escaped our throats as our bodies synced into one;  
_As we made love and lived only in that moment._

_In that moment, nothing else mattered._

_Nothing else existed._

_Our pasts became a blur and vanished into thin air._

_We didn't care about anything else._

_We only focused on each other._

_We only focused on the whispers and shakey breaths that we couldn't hold back._

_We only focused on how beautiful it sounded when the other whispered our name, how we knew that at that moment we were all the other boy could think about._

He filled the void in my chest that's been growing bigger and bigger every day.

The void that _no one else could fill._

I realized then, _I don't need to hurt anyone else._

_I don't need to be like my father._

I just need this perfect boy who _willingly_ gave me control.

The boy who _wanted_ to give me what I was taking.

The boy who showed me what I was worth.

He showed me I was worth _everything_.

And that's all I'll ever need.

**_Is this beautiful boy named Kellin Quinn._ **


End file.
